


large popcorn with a bag of m&ms

by red_shirt



Category: The Old Guard (Movie 2020)
Genre: Family, Fishing, Friendship, Gen, Going to the movies, Immortality Angst, Nicky isn't great at philosophy though he should be, Philosophy, but not really
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-01
Updated: 2021-01-01
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:33:28
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28486890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/red_shirt/pseuds/red_shirt
Summary: In Amsterdam, Nile goes to the movies. In between viewings, she fishes, and contemplates immortality.
Relationships: Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani/Nicky | Nicolò di Genova, Nile Freeman & Joe | Yusuf Al-Kaysani, Nile Freeman & Nicky | Nicolo di Genoa
Comments: 5
Kudos: 53





	large popcorn with a bag of m&ms

Nile imagines she’s in for a lot of firsts in this new life. 

First stabbing, first drowning, first bomb explosion, first strangulation. Oddly, she’s expecting those. They only rest for a couple of months after Merrick, enough time to let Andy heal, and then the jobs start coming in. All of those firsts, and many more, follow. With each new death, it gets easier and easier to pop back up and continue fighting. Death can touch her, but it can’t keep her. 

Death is the easy part.

It’s the other firsts that catch her off guard. 

They have some down time in Amsterdam. In between jobs, Joe suggests they take turns picking the “fun” activity they do when they aren’t busy teaching her various languages and fighting styles. Nile thinks it’s their way of avoiding another Booker situation. They teach her how to be an immortal, and a part of the family, and she doesn’t end up betraying them 200 years down the line.

So Nile goes first. The idea comes to her unbidden. She doesn’t question where it comes from, not at first. She just says, “Let’s go to the movies.” 

They go. None of them even know what’s playing currently, but they’re able to find some generic action flick starting soon. They buy their tickets, they buy their food, and they sit down, Nile in the middle, Andy on her left, and Nicky and Joe on her right. 

Settling into their seats, Nicky mentions they haven’t been to the theater in some time, and is excited to see what sort of improvements to fight sequences have been made in today’s action blockbusters. Joe disparages the food options. Andy happily sips on her drink from the bar. 

Nile loves the pre-show chatter as the theater continues filling in. The ads on the screen flip through film and non-film related content. There’s a kind of peace in the familiarity of a theater she hadn’t realized she missed. Before her first death was Afghanistan. Before that, her military training. She didn’t notice the absence of the theater in her life until now. Why had she stopped going? It’s not like she didn’t have chances. 

It flows through her slowly, unrecognizable at first. Something she forgot and only now just noticing, sitting in the remembered comfort of a Friday evening at the movies. That feeling stays with her even as the lights go down and the trailers begin. 

The screen in front of her blurs, and she’s in another theater, in another time. Andy, Nicky, Joe, they drop away. In their place is ... she glances to her left, and he’s there. Laughing at whatever is on screen as he eats his popcorn. They snuck into Bridesmaids. Is this then? Nile can’t look away, transfixed on this memory of her brother. She knows it’s a memory but it feels so real; the smell of buttery popcorn fills her nose. The lights from the screen dance across her brother’s face. He leans toward her. She knows what he’s going to say before he says it. 

“Can you pass me the m&ms?” the memory whispers. It echoes through her. She holds onto it, traps it inside the very deepest parts of her and doesn’t let go. He fades away just as quickly as he appeared. Where he just was, Andy still is. She catches her eye, but Nile turns back toward the screen, ready to get lost in someone else’s adventure for a while.

\--

It’s early. Earlier than usual. Still, Nicky is in the kitchen with a pot of coffee brewing, like he always is. He smiles at her as she takes a seat at the table.

“Good morning,” he says. 

“Morning,” she replies. 

This is their routine. 

Sometimes she can’t sleep. There’s Quynh. Her past life. This new one. The sound of two bullets hitting the man that killed her. Thump, thump. Almost like a heartbeat. They all mix together into a cacophony of nightmares, so loud the only way to quiet them all is to wake and head to the kitchen. She always finds Nicky there, as if he knew she would come. 

She doesn’t know how he knows, and she never asks why he’s there. 

This morning, the image of her brother sitting in that movie theater awoke her. She can’t decide if it was a good dream or not. 

As usual, Nicky asks her how she slept. They tend to avoid talking about Quynh. She’s always there, so there’s no point in mentioning it. That’s not what Nicky is asking about. It’s the run-of-the-mill nightmares of dying and being at war. He asks about her dreams.

“It’s more like a memory,” she answers. 

Nicky nods. “A bad one?”

She thinks back to that moment in the theater when everything in the present fell away and her brother sat next to her, just like he did all those times they went to the movies together. “No. But it still makes me sad.” 

“Coffee?” Nicky asks. Nile nods, and Nicky turns to the cabinets and pulls down two mugs, filling them up and adding creamer to hers. He hands the coffee over and takes a seat across from her.

“I often find that good memories are more sad than the bad ones,” he says. 

“Why is that?” She takes a sip of the coffee. It’s good. Nile’s had many cups of Nicky’s coffee, but after that moment in the theater, she realizes. Her first cup of coffee in this new life was months ago. A first she missed, lost in the chaos of resurrections and betrayal. 

“I suppose it’s because bad memories you expect to be difficult to shake. You can prepare for them. The good ones you think should leave you feeling happy. But they don’t, not always.”

Nile hums. It’s familiar, this feeling. But she was young when her dad died. She couldn’t put a name to it. “Because of what used to be.”

Nicky nods. “Now you’re getting it.”

\--

She goes to another movie, this time alone. The others are off doing their own thing. She’ll be back in time for dinner — she always is. Home-cooked dinner with all three of them, with Nicky’s cooking every night. She’ll die a thousand deaths if it meant she could have Nicky’s cooking. 

This film is some sort of space drama. It’s one of those films you can just drop into, settling back into your seat, not minding the two and a half hour runtime as long as it’s a captivating slow-burn. The music shakes the walls of the theater; Nile’s jumped from the top floor of a skyscraper, but being surrounded by a film’s heart-pounding music is another thing entirely. 

As the characters travel to different moons and planets, chasing each other in moon buggies across alien surfaces, she wonders if she’ll ever make it to space. Andy’s never said her age but she’s gathered from Nicky and Joe that Andy is around 6,000. How much has civilization changed over that time? Will she live just as long to see the stars? Or will humanity ruin that too? On screen, the main character calls the human race “world-eaters.” If they weren’t, would Nicky, Joe, Andy, and Booker exist? Would she exist? Would Quynh? 

Nile wishes she could talk to her brother about these things. He’s sitting right next to her again, but they’re not watching this space drama unfold onscreen. It’s probably one of the midnight premieres of Harry Potter, or a late night showing of one of the Paranormal Activity films. Something that had a large crowd of people in it. 

She doesn’t mind going to the movies alone, but with her brother, they always made it an experience. Large popcorn to share, with a bag of M&Ms to mix them together. They would show up early because Elijah always liked watching the trailers, and afterwards they would go to a diner and order breakfast, no matter what time of day it was, and discuss the film. Those were her favorite days growing up. 

Nile doesn’t mind going to the movies alone, but she wishes her brother were here.

\--

It’s Joe’s turn, and he chooses fishing. 

“Fishing?” Nile asks. They’re all sitting around the dinner table eating Nicky’s homemade lasagna. The wine is flowing and they’ve been laughing and telling stories since they all sat down. Nile, on her third glass of wine, loves sitting here with these people, even with one empty chair, and the memory of family dinners past in Chicago. 

“Have you never fished before?” Andy asks. 

“I have!” She glances at Joe. “I just thought we were supposed to be choosing fun things.” 

Joe splutters, setting down his fork. “Hey!” 

Nile smiles while Nicky laughs and laughs while he passes around another bottle of wine. 

The next morning they set out for downtown Amsterdam. She has fished before, but it was always something she did with her dad. She didn’t keep up with it after he died except maybe a trip or two with Elijah. 

They’re out in rural Amsterdam, so it takes about 30 minutes to make it to the city. Nicky and Joe have their own fishing poles and tackle box, so they step into a bait shop for travel poles and savage gear lures for Andy and Nile. 

“You don’t keep any fishing gear here?” Nile asks Andy as they’re checking out at the register. 

Andy hands money over to the attendant. “The place here is entirely Nicky and Joe’s. Not much of my stuff is here.”

“Oh.” Nile hadn’t realized they were living in Nicky and Joe’s space. Not every safehouse is just a safehouse, she supposes. 

Andy laughs. “Don’t worry — we’re not intruding. They haven’t been here in awhile, and besides, it’s not like we didn’t use to live on top of each other all the time back in the day.” Andy takes the change while gesturing to Nile to grab the supplies. Nile rolls her eyes but grabs it anyway. 

“Just because I’m new, I’m not always going to carry everything, you know.” 

Andy smiles, and they head out the door.

Nicky and Joe are lounging on the curb outside, chatting quietly. As Andy and Nile approach, they stop. From the way they jump apart and glance at them, it’s clear whatever they were talking about wasn’t meant for their ears. 

Nile raises her eyebrows at them. “What’s up?”

Nicky at least looks sheepish, but Joe only smirks and claps his hands together. “Absolutely nothing, Nile. Let’s go!” 

He sets off down the street, fishing pole and gear in hand. Nicky shrugs at her and says “c’mon,” and then catches up to Joe, sliding his hand into his when he does.

“They are weird,” Nile says. 

“Tell me about it,” Andy replies. “Let’s go, before they take the good fishing spots.”

\--

It might not be her thing, but fishing is definitely for ponds or lakes, with the sky stretching for miles above her and reflecting even larger in the water below her. Fishing in Amsterdam, however, is a whole other story. 

They choose a spot along the street, where hundreds of people are milling about. It’s strange, watching people shuffle by, lost in their own lives, brushing past the four of them, not knowing who they are or that they’ll outlive all of them. To Nile, they seem small, all of a sudden. She looks at Andy setting up her pole, to Nicky and Joe already casting theirs into the canal below them. Andy, Joe, and Nicky, who have seen entire empires rise and fall, countless wars be fought, crossing paths with all sorts of people, helping them and killing others in equal measure. Saving the world, one thoughtful deed at a time. Burning it, all the other times. Nile wonders if they’re aware of time passing them by, or if the longevity of their lives means they’re immune even to the slow ticking clock of inevitability. 

Nile hooks her lure to the end of her line and tosses it out. The “plonk” of the lure ripples in the water. In her head, Copley’s wall stretches before her, connecting the dots of Andy, Nicky, Joe, and Booker’s lives. It only goes back 150 years. There’s so much more they’ve done, and all of it lost except for what they remember and what’s hidden between the pages. 

They know, Nile thinks. At least, now they do. 

A tug on her line breaks her from her thoughts. “Oh!” she says. Nile starts reeling her line in slowly, waiting to see if it’s just a nibble or if something’s decided to stay. A few moments pass, then another harder tug straightens her line, and she’s reeling it in faster.

“You got it!” Joe exclaims. He’s made his way over from Nicky to cheer her on, leaving Nicky scrambling to watch both their poles.

“Joe!” Nile hears Nicky yell. “You’ve got a fish on your line too!” 

Nile laughs. “Joe, go handle your own fish. I’ve got this.” 

“I want to see what you get,” Joe says, leaning over the railing to watch the fish come up. “Nicky’s got it, don’t you, dear?”

Nicky’s grumbling gets lost in Joe’s shout as Nile’s fish makes its way over the railing. Nile grabs the end of the line, pulling the fish closer to her. It’s bigger than she thought a fish would be in a canal, with red scales on its fins underneath its belly. “What is it?” 

Joe smiles. “That’s a Big Redfin Perch. It’s a Big Redfin Perch, Nicky!” he calls over his shoulder. 

An idea pops into her head. She reaches into her back pocket for her phone. “Can you take my picture?”

Joe takes her phone, but doesn’t ask why she wants a picture of herself that she can’t show anyone. Nile holds up her fish as well as she can as Joe snaps a photo. He hands it back with a smile that’s a lot softer than the one he had as she reeled her fish in. Nile meets his eyes. “Don’t tell Andy we took a photo.” 

Joe nods in understanding. “Let’s toss him back in.” 

Nile takes one more look at her fish before taking him off the lure. The water ripples when it’s tossed back, but they fade away quickly, smoothing back out into the clear surface of the water once again. 

Nicky wanders over with his and Joe’s fishing lines, looking like the world somehow ended in the time Joe left him to fend for himself. “Joe, I lost your fish.”

Joe pats him on the back. “Don’t worry, dear. Nile caught her first fish. It was worth it.” 

“It wasn’t my first fish,” Nile grumbles, getting her line ready to toss back out. 

“It was your first one with us! And your first street fishing in Amsterdam. That’s pretty huge.” Joe takes his pole back from Nicky. 

Nile eyes the both of them, Nicky trying his best to look innocent, Joe gleefully throwing his line back out. 

“You two are acting weird,” Nile accuses. 

Nicky’s eyebrows raise. “I don’t think so,” he says. He’s not very convincing, though. “Where’s Andy?” Nicky asks, settling against the railing in between Nile and Joe. 

Like she had been waiting for the call, Andy saunters over to them. “So — while you three were reeling in one fish and losing another, I’ve caught about five.” Andy smirks at them. Nile doesn’t get it at first, but when she catches on, she feels her competitive streak rise up. 

“Oh, is that how it’s going to be?” 

There’s a pause. The four of them stand in this moment as the weight of competition draws nigh, as loyalties shift and align. Nile makes a decision. “Me and Joe against Nicky and Andy. First team to 10 wins, and the losers do everyone’s laundry for the rest of the time we’re in Amsterdam.” 

Andy opens her mouth to speak, but Nile holds up her hand. “And no, you’re five don’t count. We start clean.” 

Nicky and Joe look at each other. Nile holds her gaze on Andy. Another moment passes. Then, they’re moving. Nicky grabs his line, presses a kiss to Joe’s cheek. 

“May you fall short in the face of our glory,” he says.

“And may you be forgotten when they tell of our victory,” Joe replies. 

Andy rolls her eyes, grabbing Nicky’s hand as they move further down the railing. 

They’ve secured their battle positions. Joe gives Nile a nod. “To glory.” 

“To victory,” she says. 

\--

It’s mid-afternoon by the time they’re heading back. Nicky and Andy are passed out in the backseat. Losing is rather tiring, Nile supposes. 

Joe’s driving, humming happily along to the radio. Both of them are high on winning, and at the prospect of not having to do laundry for an indefinite amount of time. They caught more redfin perch, and a couple of Zanders. 10-6 goes to Nile and Joe. Joe’s probably already writing of their victory in his head.

“You’re right, that was fun.” 

Joe smiles. “I’m usually always right.” 

“Uh huh. Would Nicky agree with that statement?” 

Joe’s brow furrows, like he’s lost in thought for a moment. “Yep, I’m pretty sure he would.” 

They lapse into silence again. Outside the window, windmills pass them by. Dark clouds roll across the sky in contrast to the bright green fields beneath them. Joe hums along with the radio. Today was a good day. 

“Are you going to tell me why you and Nicky are acting weird?” 

Joe sighs, then turns down the volume on the radio. “We just want you to be happy, Nile.”

Nile frowns. “I’m not going to turn into Booker, if that’s what you’re worried about.” 

Joe’s hands tighten on the steering wheel at the mention of Booker, his knuckles turning white. But only for a moment. In an impressive bit of what Nile would call self-centering, maybe, Joe shakes away the thought of Booker and looks over to Nile. 

“It’s not about Booker,” he says. 

“But --”

“Nile. It’s not.” At Nile’s raised eyebrows, Joe shakes his head. “Okay, maybe at first. But this life you’ve entered, it’s not an easy one. We want you to be happy for you, and we’re trying to be better about making the team actually feel like what we’ve said it is — a family. Does that make sense?”

“I suppose.” Nile remembers the movie theater, how easily Elijah appeared to her. How far away he feels. The water ripples, and then it smooths out again, like they were never there. 

“But Joe … “

“Hmm?” His eyes are back on the road, but Nile can tell he’s bracing for something. Like he knows what she’s about to say. 

“I have a family. In Chicago.” Joe doesn’t say anything, so she keeps going. “And I’m not sure I want to keep them waiting any longer, not while they’re still here.” 

Nile’s turned all the way in her seat now, facing Joe completely, waiting for him to respond. She doesn’t need their permission. But she’ll need an explanation for her mom and Elijah, and that at least requires some discussion. 

“I think … “ Joe starts. She waits. “... we can arrange something.” His eyes flick to the rearview mirror. Nile turns around — Andy and Nicky are awake, staring at her. She can’t decipher the look on Andy’s face, but Nicky’s smiling. 

“It’s okay, Nile,” he says. 

She thinks it will be. 

\--

The movies again. This time just with Nicky. They’re early. Earlier than usual. 

When Nile ordered a large popcorn and a bag of M&Ms, Nicky looked disgusted. “C’mon, you’ll like it.” 

Now, sitting in their seats, waiting for the previews to begin, Nicky happily eats Nile’s favorite movie theater snack. “The way the heat of the popcorn melts the chocolate from the M&Ms,” he marvels. “And — 

“And how the butter from the popcorn mixes in with the chocolate. Told you,” Nile smirks at him. 

“Hmm.” Nicky adds more M&Ms to the popcorn, shaking the bag to mix them properly. “What are we seeing again?”

“I don’t know, some romance drama.”

“A chick-flick?” 

“Probably. Do you have a problem with that?”

“Oh, not at all. I love them,” Nicky says. He’s being serious, and Nile laughs at him. 

“Don’t eat all of it before the movie even starts, Nicky.” She grabs the bag out of his lap, and he only protests a little.

They’re still 20 minutes from showtime. She’ll probably have to go get more popcorn and M&Ms at the rate Nicky is eating them. Her fingers move along the ridge of the popcorn bag. “My brother and I used to go to the movies together all the time. He loved mixing the M&Ms with the popcorn too. It was his idea, at first.” 

“What’s his name?” 

“Eljah.” 

“You’ll be seeing them soon. Are you excited?” Nicky asks. He takes the popcorn back and keeps eating at the same pace he was before. Unbelievable, Nile thinks, feeling a warmth settle into her she hadn’t realized was missing.

“Yeah,” she says. “I’m scared, though. What if they react the same way Booker’s family did?” She doesn’t think they will, although her unit clearly didn’t react well. The thought of her unit hurts. She hasn’t thought about them in awhile. Perhaps it’s for the best. 

“Maybe they will.” Nicky shrugs. “But maybe they won’t.” 

“Thanks, that’s really helpful.” 

Nicky laughs. “Whatever happens, you’ll only know when it does. So you might as well do it.” 

Nile frowns at him, stealing back the popcorn. “You’d think that someone who’s 900 years old and has probably met famous philosophers, you’d be a better one.” 

“Touche, Nile. Touche.” 

They settle back into their seats as the lights go down. The popcorn is almost empty, but Nile would rather get lost in someone else’s story for a while anyway. She looks over at Nicky again. “Will you go with me?” 

Nicky raises a questioning brow. 

“To meet my mom and brother. All three of you? I just … what you said about the good memories being more sad and unexpected than the bad ones … maybe they won’t be as sad if there’s more people to remember them?” 

Nicky nods, and with a mouthful of the last of the M&Ms and popcorn, he says, “Now you’re getting it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Is this basically just an ode to going to the movies because i miss going to the movies? yes. yes it is. 
> 
> also, i haven't written fic in years or even done any fictional prose writing in a really long time. this was fun. and there will most likely be sequels to this. this was born out of the idea that i didn't think it was quite fair that Nile leaves her family, who are alive and well, and joins this immortal family, just based off anecdotal evidence from the guy who betrays them. the film mostly leaves it up in the air, but the comics certainly don't have Nile thinking much about her family. that makes me sad. so, off to meet Nile's family we go. 
> 
> i don't know how i ended up there, but i have no watched a lot of youtube videos about fishing in Amsterdam. i've never been to Amsterdam, so if I've got something wrong here about the fishing culture, please let me know. i'll do my best to fix it. 
> 
> and of course, the usual disclaimer that these characters are from the brilliant minds of Greg Rucka and Gina Prince-Bythewood. I'm just borrowing for a bit. 
> 
> follow me on tumblr @ https://www.tumblr.com/blog/redshirt2 .


End file.
